The Jewish sin we never confess: Choosing indifference over love – opinion

The article discusses the Jewish concept of repentance and forgiveness, particularly concerning interpersonal relationships during the High Holy Days. It highlights that Yom Kippur atones for sins between a person and God, but not for wrongs between individuals until the offended party is appeased. Maimonides' law dictates that if someone refuses forgiveness after three attempts with witnesses, the sin shifts to the one refusing. The author defines "love" in this context not as general benevolence, but as an "unearned, non-transferable, unbreakable claim that one specific, irreplaceable person has on you." The article identifies the unconfessed sin as indifference, or "writing someone off," which removes the other person from any obligation and is presented as clarity rather than a transgression. The law, however, is more concerned with what one becomes by being "right." The author emphasizes that this concept of love removes the "exit" from difficult relationships, contrasting it with a "thin Jewish identity" that erases the face of the other. An exception is made for a wronged teacher, where forgiveness must be sought a thousand times, signifying an unbreakable bond. The article concludes by noting that the love we seek from God on Yom Kippur, "freely – not a verdict on their merit," is the same love we often fail to extend to others throughout the year.